Stuff and Nonsense

I won’t be voting Labour. I never have. However, I do have some advice for Gordon that I believe if heeded would do the Government nothing but good. Of course, if Gordon isn’t listening (very likely since I doubt he’s one of my five readers) then perhaps Nick or Dave should strenuously suggest it. After all, if Gordy listens, it was your idea (I require no accreditation) and if not, he’s just improved your election chances still further. It’s a win win.

The plan? Authorise every British consulate the world over to block book hotel rooms in the vicinity. Instruct them to block book coaches and despatch them to major cities the world over. Instruct stranded Britons to go to those cities and get on those coaches. Don’t send the coaches to Calais, send them to Holland and Germany to utilise ferries from there. Buy bulk places on ferries and pay whatever is necessary to get ferry companies to squeeze in more capacity. Use those hotel rooms to put up Britons while the coaches start to flow and the backlog starts to clear.

Tell the people not to worry. Tell them the government will recover hotel and food costs from the airlines when it’s all over. Let’s face it, the sooner this is done, the less liabilities for food and hotels the airlines will see. The airlines should cooperate with this.

Total cost? I’d bet less than 10 million. A lot of money for sure, but you will buy the vote of everyone you repatriate and everyone who is waiting for them. Buying votes is not exactly democratic but you can defend this position.

The opposition say “it’s wasteful, knee kerk”… you say “Tell that to the stranded people, may of whom on their one holiday of the year on a budget airline in jobs that won’t pay them when absent, with children missing school and running up debts that will take them years to pay off as they dwarf the cost of their hard saved for holiday”

What else can the opposition say? The worst they can say is that you delayed a rescue. That will be true so you can stand up and say “Yes, we delayed, we had to wait and see but enough’s enough now, we’re acting and we’re getting people home”.

The opposition will accuse you of buying votes, of course they will. They will accuse you of making political capital out of a less-than-end-of-the-world scenario. But you will be able to stand up in the next debate and say, “whatever you think of this government, whatever happens in the election I will sleep well knowing that I mobilised the power of our democracy for the benefit of people in need when the people needed it”.

Only good can come of this for the Government, if you act now, and act big. No more lame warship gestures with space for a few hundred people. Go in heavy and sort it out. This exercise will cost you less than one day’s War.

I commend it to the house!

I received the following email from undoubtedly well-intentioned email contacts.

4 THINGS YOU PROBABLY NEVER KNEW YOUR MOBILE PHONE COULD DO
There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies.
Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival.
Check out the things that you can do with it:
FIRST Emergency
The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112.
If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialled even if the key pad is locked. Try it out.
SECOND Have you locked your keys in the car?
Does your car have remote keyless entry?
This may come in handy someday.
Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spa re keys are at home, call someone at home on their mobile phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, holding it near the mobile phone on their end. Your car will unlock. Saves someone from having to drive your keys to you. Distance is no object. You could be hundreds of miles away, and if you can reach someone who has the other ‘remote’ for your car, you can unlock the doors (or the trunk).
Editor’s Note: It works fine! We tried it out and it unlocked our car over a mobile phone!’
THIRD Hidden Battery Power
Imagine your mobile battery is very low. To activate, press the keys *3370 #
Your mobile will restart with this reserve and the instrument will show a 50 % increase in battery.
This reserve will get charged when you charge your mobile next time.
FOURTH How to disable a STOLEN mobile phone?
To check your Mobile phone’s serial number, key in the following digits on your phone: * # 0 6 #
A 15 digit code will appear on the screen. This number is unique to your handset.
Write it down and keep it somewhere safe. When your phone gets stolen, you can phone your service provider and give them this code.
They will then be able to block your handset so even if the thief changes the SIM card, your phone will be totally useless.
You probably won’t get your phone back, but at least you know that whoever stole it can’t use/sell it either.
If everybody does this, there would be no point in people stealing mobile phones.
ATM – PIN Number Reversal – Good to Know
If you should ever be forced by a robber to withdraw money from an ATM machine, you can notify the police by entering your PIN # in reverse.
For example, if your pin number is 1234, then you would put in 4321.
The ATM system recognizes that your PIN number is backwards from the ATM card you placed in the machine.
The machine will still give you the money you requested, but unknown to the robber, the police will be immediately dispatched to the location.
This information was recently broadcast on CTV by Crime Stoppers however it is seldom used because people just don’t know about it.

The first three should be obviously bollocks to most people with enough IQ to actually use a mobile phone number but in case not, here is a link to some folks who did bother to research rather than mislead others into potentially dangerous beliefs.

On the crimestoppers mention, which has been subtly changed to be UK centric from a well known US hoax mail, the crime stoppers website contains a response about it.

The only one that is correct and useful is item 4. Everyone should record their IMEI number in case of phone theft. Calling your network to block your SIM will stop you getting call charges but blocking the handset itself makes it worthless to the thief. However, for an IMEI blocked by your network to become known to the police and all other networks takes up to 48 hours. If you simply goto Immobilise and register your details and your phones (you can do all the family’s phones and other property too and it’s FREE.) Then in the event of theft you can obtain the IMEI easily to report to your network. But you can also mark it as stolen on your account (in addition to calling the police of course) and this will mean that your details as the apparent owner and the fact that it is stolen will show up on the Police National Mobile Property Register INSTANTLY. Additionally, the phone will not be able to be traded in at most second hand stores because they use CheckMEND which is also notified instantly.

Please, do us all a favour folks and do not forward on warnings that you have not verified.

• Do you want a traveller to a foreign country to feel threatened and dialing some stupid number that they found out from you instead of finding out the REAL local emergency number before travel?
• Do you want a sick infant on holiday to die because the stupid ignorant unprepared parents assumed that what you forwarded was real instead of checking?
• Do you want to be responsible for the ATM holdup victim who gets stabbed because they entered their pin backwards 3 times and the assailant couldn’t get any money? They then bleed to death in the mistaken beliefe that the police or an ambulance is going to show up before they check out?

These are real situations with real dangers.

I’ve had email for 20 years just about and can honestly say that I have NEVER received an email like this one that was substantially real. These days, you can debunk these with 30 seconds effort on Google. If you can’t be arsed to do that, just keep them to yourselves.

Total time to do a little research and type the above? 15 minutes. Google found the crimestoppers and hoax debunk pages in a little under 1.3 seconds. You see? you could check before forwarding.

Declaration of Interest: I’m a director of Recipero Ltd that owns and runs Immobilise and CheckMEND and provides the National Mobile Property Register to the Police and other government agencies. This doesn’t colour my advice though, merely explains why I make it my job to know this stuff. Of course this blog and all the comments on it are my personal comments and views and not those of Recipero Ltd, as if you needed telling.